Monthly Archives: July 2012

Inflated Numbers = Inflated Egos

I am going to try and NOT repeat “Internet Taught Me Statistics” because I feel like I’m just repeating myself if I do. But instead I’m going to give a story about social media.

If it’s something I love doing – it’s entertain. So if people like what I do (which is still weird to me), they can click “Follow” on Twitter, “Subscribe” on YouTube or “Friend” me on Facebook.

I’m a twentysomething who writes dumb stuff on the internet – I make REALLY pointless videos, which people enjoy, and I usually spam my twitter with either…

  • A retweet from a friend on Facebook
  • A long pointless, and depressing rant on how my dreams won’t come true
  • Links to YouTube videos
  • Posting pictures of things I saw at the store

Among other things.

But apparently to the mindless – 500+ people seem to like this enough to “follow me” but who exactly are these people?

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Sunday Showcase: Mr Bean at the 2012 Olympics

It’s probably already posted on the internet numerous times. But here’s something awesome I wanted to show you all today, as if you didn’t already see the Olympics.

Magic Mixtape #58 – Rocky Mountain Oysters

[blip.tv http://blip.tv/play/AYL_imMA?p=1 width=”590″ height=”334″]

Dedicated to the men and women of North Carolina who forced my good friend Dylan to consume Rocky Mountain Oysters to win AAA Baseball tickets. He can never look at testicles the same way again. And similar to the taste of rocky mountain oysters, this video might leave a bad taste in your mouth. Horray!

Assassin’s Creed III is going to be overrated.

This year has been the best and worst year for video games at my residence. I made the leap from Xbox 360 to Playstation 3 and discovered this really cool thing called “Indie Games”. But one series that I really loved was “Assassin’s Creed”, an alternate-history open world parkour parading templar killing video game in which you relive the history of people in terrible accents.

Well as it turns out, the Italian Renaissance was overdone, and now we move onto the American Revolution. I think this is going to be the game that will bring new people into the world of Assassin’s Creed, which is going to be a blessing and a curse.

Here are five reasons why I don’t like the upcoming Assassin’s Creed video game.

  • More Terrible Multiplayer

In Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood and Revelations, Ubisoft  introduced a completely unnecessary multiplayer game that was very fun. Essentially it is “Hunt or be Hunted”, where you try and assassinate someone before someone else assassinates you. But what ended up happening was “ROOFTOP RUNNING ROOFTOP RUNNING ROOFTOP RUNNING JUMP KILL”. Just imagine that but with MORE people doing the same thing, and you might end up having AC3 Multiplayer

  • Desmond Miles?

So far, nothing has been talked about regarding the actual main character of Desmond Miles. The Assassin’s Creed video games revolves around this guy discovering the secrets of his ancestors. While we we’re treated (or tortured) to Animus Island in the last game. We have no info regarding this guy, and if tumblr wonders “WHO IS THIS GUY THAT’S NOT CONNOR-DESU?” I am quitting this series.

  • Questionable Storyline

Connor is part European and part Native American – I hope the storyline is him questioning his alliance between Americans and British Forces as both of them “took his land and slaughtered its people”. Thus far, it just looks like “Connor helps Americans and kills the British lol”. At least have Benedict Arnold show up and add a twist to the game, or better yet – have me hug Ben Franklin the same way Ezio hugged Leonardo Da Vinci.

  • 2012

The Assassin’s Creed universe takes place in 2012. Last time I checked, that’s the current year we are living in. I was surprised we didn’t end up having it be completely Desmond Miles in present day America/Italy/Whatever. But it looks like we aren’t going to go through that story yet. So when the PS4 comes out, we’ll reminisce about the good old days of 2012, in good ol 2016.

  • The sequels and expansions

Just like previous games, they have more supplements and addendums to the Assassin’s Creed Universe. Assassin’s Creed 3 is no exception, except for that for the first time – we’re playing as a female assassin! Does this mean we get to visit a new character in the series and see her ancestors? Does this mean we’re going to use Ancestry.com to find out our relatives and visit their memories? How many more times are we going to visit American Revolution before we go try the Civil War or World War 2?

BUT I AM STILL GETTING THE GAME

I’m not going to preorder the game, I don’t need an inflatable tomahawk nor a really terrible flag that shows my  allegiance to the game series. I’ll probably get it a couple weeks after launch, when I am not too busy being swamped with school stuff or Halloween.

 

Dark Knight Rises is Awkward, Has Batman!

Before I get to doing what everyone else on the internet does whenever a new movie or video game comes out. I just want to say that it was a fun movie to go see. If you are a fan of Batman, you’ve probably already seen this movie or already have plans to go see it. Therefore, this article will do nothing to assist you in a purchasing decision. If anything, it’s telling you to just purchase it as a Matinee.

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